An ad hoc autopsy of England's disastrous Ashes tour has surfaced just days after the tourists capitulated under lights during the fifth Test in Hobart.
In a report published by English journalist Nick Hoult of The Telegraph, the squad skippered by Joe Root were blasted for their poor preparation, culture and performances throughout their nightmare stint down under.
While Hoult's review states that issues surrounding bad weather, a lack of tour matches and incorrect selections played a major role in the Three Lions never offering a roar on Australian shores, further barbs relating to the side's drinking culture and lack of conditioning were also levelled.
Printed in the wake of Australia's day 3 demolition of the tourists with the pink Kookaburra, the report also delineated that a rift was created within the English camp after certain members of the travelling party objected to invasive PCR testing.
“Some players refused to do it, others did it and then made a stand saying they would not let their partners and young children go through the same procedure," Hoult wrote.
"It led to the biggest row between players and management of the whole tour and was only resolved by the resumption of normal PCR testing for those who refused.”
Jabs at the conditioning of the collective were also thrown, with medium-pace bowler Ollie Robinson wearing the brunt of the lacerating claims.
“One player refused to take part in the skin-fold test — a gauge of body fat — and, when pressed, accused England of trying to fat shame him. The test was never carried out,” Hoult continued.
“Fitness levels clearly dipped for some players, who started the tour in good shape but appeared to let that side drift as the tour went on. [Ollie] Robinson’s conditioning was an issue from the first Test, when he spent time off the field, but became a recurring theme in every game.”
Following a decision to play golf rather than rehabilitate ahead of the final Test of the series, Robinson wore further scorn from England's bowling coach, Jon Lewis, in regards to his fitness.
“It [fitness] is something he (Robinson) needs to improve. He’s got a record of playing a lot of games of county cricket,” Lewis levelled.
“Playing international cricket is a higher intensity and you play all year around. He’s got to get used to understanding what it takes to be a full-time, year-round international cricketer.
“That’s something he is going to have to deal with. It is one of his things he really needs to work on.”
While ambiguous reports surrounding a boozy culture in the dressing rooms was also eluded to, Hoult suggested that an issue at the heart of England's demise was confusion surrounding tactics.
These woes reportedly came to a head after spinner Jack Leach was left out of the XI for the second Test in Adelaide.
“Some senior players felt left out of discussions over tactics and another was angered to learn he had been dropped after reading it in the press," Hoult continued.
"Another felt he had not been given enough time to prepare for a Test, learning only 48 hours before that he would be playing.
“The tactics for Leach also caused bemusement among the squad. Before the Brisbane Test it was agreed England would be defensive when Leach came on for the first time, knowing Australia would be scenting blood. Players were incredulous when Root brought the field in and attacked, with Leach being taken apart by Australia’s top order. It took him weeks to get over and affected selection for Adelaide.”
Although a thorough interrogation is sure to be undertaken behind closed doors, these claims appear congruous to the performances produced by Root's men since the series opener in Brisbane.
Having failed to surpass the 300-run mark at any stage of the series, and only posting single innings scores beyond 250 on three occasions, there has been a prevailing view that this contemporary English collective has been the worst to tour Australia since Jimmy Adam's West Indian team during the summer of 2000/01.
England will now lick their wounds ahead of their next red-ball assignment in the Caribbean.
The three-Test series against the West Indies is set to commence on March 9 with the opener scheduled for Sir Vivian Richards Stadium in Antigua.
